This is the part wherein I pass out the immaterial awards for meritorious or heinous conduct. I'd like to point out that, due to the beta's odd approach to match-making, a few of the general public were able to sneak into each round. I've taken the liberty of excluding them from the nomination pool (with a few notable exceptions: TommacoFarmer) in an effort to keep things fair for our readers and to not talk smack about randoms (I'm staring right at you xnplaxbox -- you were universally reviled). Therefore, I give you the awards from our second Halo 3 beta 'Spy-Hunter:
Most gentlemanly killer: Quaunaut
Most lethal dude with hilarious name: TommacoFarmer
Most likely to whine about "flag camping": Losers
Most likely to be flushed out of hiding by a grenade: Gabe
Most likely to tripmine teammates: Scooter
Favorite 'Spy-Hunter veteran: TIE - SpikeDelight and JT4MTB
Least likely to weapon-swap instead of reload: Gabe
Best rally: Blue Team (you guys rock!)
Most Shamefully Craven: Sterling (it's tradition at this point)
Please take a moment to mentally congratulate these fine (and not-so-fine) fellows on a job well done. They have all demonstrated particular valor on the digital battlefield and should be remembered in the annals of heroism. Thanks go to all for a good game.
The Interminable Road Ahead
Sorry for the short notice, but we're going to be playing the Halo 3 beta for our next installment of 'Spy-Hunter tonight (Wednesday, May 30 at 7 p.m. PST). I know, I know... it's a rough life, but hopefully some of you will be up for it. I hate to spring it on you guys, but maybe it will help my kill/death ratio. Down the road, we're looking to expand into the strange realm of the PS3, so watch Sterling's PS3 page for updates on when we'll begin playing Resistance. If you would like to participate in tonight's festivities, just keep reading because the instructions are coming up right now:
Shoot a friend request to one of the following GameSpy editors:
Gabe Graziani: GabeSpy
Sterling McGarvey: GSI Sterling M
Patrick Joynt: GSIJoynt
Thierry "Scooter" Nguyen: GSIScooter
On game day (remember, those are -usually- alternating Wednesdays, so the next one is May 30) sign on and look for the editor that you have befriended. Once you've got a bead on one of us, shoot us a message and we'll invite you to the game on a first come first served basis. Sound simple? It is… at least, for you anyway.
Your Rights or the Lack Thereof
There are a couple of things that I go over before the throw down hoe-down every week, but I need to restate them over and over again for safety's sake. Firstly, we reserve the right to kick you out of the game and/or off of our friends lists at any time and for any reason - this, unfortunately, is not up for discussion so mind your manners, please. Possible reasons for bootage include but are not limited to: an inordinate amount of swearing or other forms of epithets relating to sexual orientation or mental disability (if you can't make it through a match without dropping an f-bomb or calling someone an r-tard, mute your mic), unsportsmanlike conduct (gloating or otherwise insulting other players - especially team-killing in games that allow that sort of thing) and anything that might generally make you come off as a jackass. Keep in mind, these rules do not necessarily apply to the GameSpy staff, and you may be subjected to ruthless mocking during the game itself or in the subsequent column documenting the matches (though you have my word that we'll make our finest effort to refrain from such chicanery).
As a quick aside, we will run a routine purge of our friends lists in order to keep the matches open to all. As you may already be aware, Microsoft enforces a strict 100 friend limit and so we need to make an effort to ensure that everyone gets a chance to gun us down in cold blood. This purge is nothing personal, and we invite you to reapply before the next match.
GameSpy reserves the right to commit your gamertag to video, so if you want to maintain your relative anonymity, I do not recommend participating in this event. In the week that follows the match, I'll write up our violent little encounters and give nods to those that deserve them. Specifically, that means that I'll do a rundown of highlights from the match and I may use your gamertag in the column. I'd like to think of this as an incentive, but if you don't you can consider this fair warning. I also plan on issuing awards based on some random criteria that I just plain make up; although, some will be standards like an award for who killed the most people. Again, we are going to be recording an HD video feed of these matches, so be aware that you may be filmed doing something ridiculous or unflattering and I will take that opportunity to poke fun at your n00bness.
There you have it. This Wednesday, May 30. Seven o'clock post meridian pacific standard time. Halo 3 beta (yes, again... and again and again!).
Try dual-wielding the SMG... I'm sure it will work out in your favor, sucker.
